Our pastor has a theme for this year and it’s this; will you let go? Will you really let go of all those things that keep you all tangled up in guilt, shame, fear, doubt? Let go from those things that keep you from embracing true freedom and peace and embrace the truth that you are passionately and unconditionally known and loved? Ahhh…doesn’t that sound wonderful? Now how in the world do we begin? How do we really let go of old perceptions, behaviors and systems of thought embedded so deeply, we have no idea they exist. No matter how you look at it…or how much you know and how desperately you want it, it’s not easy. The Bible says “…the truth will set you free,” however there is only one truth; God joining his own creation and taking their judgment upon Himself, in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. That is truth! And an incredible truth it is! In that one event is wrapped up the answer to the longing in every single human heart desperate to know they matter, they have value, are fiercely loved and that life ultimately has meaning. Unfortunately, even as we, who believe this with all our hearts, and know that we know we’ve been given that new life which only comes through Jesus Christ; we also bring along some deeply rooted perceptions of God, our selves, others and the world around us that are, well…not true at all. You know that’s true! How many of us look back on early Christian years and think “I can’t believe I did this or thought that?” only to realize at this point, our ideas about Christianity were much different than we once thought. As life, in its sudden twists and unexpected turns happens, we’re left reeling in amazement that God is much bigger, wiser, and more inconceivable than we’d ever settled for in our shockingly limited human thinking. Not only though, are our silly preconceptions of Almighty God all upside down, but just when we confidently think we’ve got our self or anything for that matter, figured out…we don’t! In fact, the circumstances of life sometimes crash in like a tsunami, and only living life, facing those circumstances, feeling their pain, sometimes failing, and yes, even at times falling into the pit of despair do we ever break free from our old misconceptions about God and our self. Some of us have discovered in our most agonizing moments the real truth; that we weren’t responding from truth at all, but our own perceptions of it.
Are you confused? Let me explain from something personal, something that’s happened recently. Honestly, after uncurling from the fetal position, I’m just now peeking out from behind the wall I’ve been hiding. Why was I hiding? Long story short, determined to help out (or possibly take over) in a financial crisis, I answered an ad in the paper for a job as a flight attendant for a small regional airline. After getting through the initial interview, the company provided 3 weeks of training in upstate NY. I traveled there, worked hard, passed the final, got my “wings,” and was shipped directly to begin my new career. However, before the third flight of my first day of on-the-job training, I decided it was not for me (that’s actually putting it mildly. I hated it) and asked to be let off when we landed in a city within a few hours of home. (No exaggeration!) It’s even flakier than I’ve revealed, but another time, another place. After a short-lived relief of being home with all the sights and sounds of Christmas, the realization of my anxiously and recklessly made decision began to set in. To my utter dismay, all the reality of the hopeless financial situation we were in even before I left flooded in. Talk about feeling like a dufus! So humiliated at my lame attempt to “save the family” from financial ruin with an important airline career and then my perceived utter failure that I wouldn’t answer any of the countless calls and emails of people who love me, care and sincerely wished me well. Instead of receiving the many, many offers of love and encouragement, it just seemed easier and maybe a bit more humanly natural to focus on character flaws pointed out “lovingly” along life’s journey. My tendency to be inconsistent, uncommitted and a bit compulsive was confirmed and echoed louder than any voice of unconditional love.
What makes it all worse is that I’ve created an entire website about coming clean! Nakedandunashamed.org is built on the most exciting News in the universe and boldly proclaims the one Truth that affects every single one of us; that in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, we’ve been forgiven and restored spiritually. We’re made whole and freed from living up to others expectations by the assurance that the ONE Who knows us better than we know our very selves says essentially; I know your thoughts before you even think them. I know your choices before you even choose them. In other words; I’ve seen you naked and there is no need to be ashamed! One look at the cross tells us His intentions towards us; we’re loved, we’ve been forgiven, there’s no need to hide! We’ve been bought with an inconceivable price that says to us, “You, child, are valuable!” I believe wholeheartedly that this is the absolute truth and have even learned to some degree to react and respond from the core of that truth…when all is well. However, I hate being naked…or vulnerable, when I’ve made a flaky choice and fall flat on my face; short of my own expectations of what a “Christian” is supposed to be like.
Ok, so you can’t hide forever, hopefully, at some point you have to think it through…and not according to your own perceptions and ideas…but according to The Truth! Don’t you think that’s what God intends all along?? For you to think it through and perhaps come to a different conclusion than you once settled for? This is huge because when we get to the “bottom” or “let go” of anything and stop trying to manipulate God to change this circumstance, that situation or see it our way…we begin to see it His way; the real way; in the truth; that we’re not on some journey to super human moral spiritual perfection, but instead to another level of child-like trust in the One Who is never compulsive and always consistent and even when we fail, we CANNOT disappoint HIM because He’s outside of time. I can’t say I understand what that means, except if One is outside of time, then He knows everything I will do or am capable of doing before He gave me His gift of new Life…HIS Life…and He gave it anyway.
I tell you, I’ve read 2Cor 4:16-18 so many times, and each time it becomes deeper…and less in the “spiritual clouds” if you know what I mean. We’re so ingrained with inherited expectations, thoughts, behaviors and perceptions, muddled with a million ‘experts’ and changing standards of what a Christian….or simply a human being on this planet is “supposed” to live like and be like, we can easily find ourselves very discouraged or even despairing in a second. You know what that verse tells me? It’s ok. It’s ok to be human. That’s why He came. God became “flesh” and in Him we have One Who knows what that feels like and says come here, come to me when you’re feeling frail and a disappointment, when the world is chasing you and seems to be closing in. Come here, here without the thousand other voices telling you about Me where you will find the burden lifted and peace beyond what makes any possible human sense. It’s hard for you to see, I know…but come to me when you need to know who you are rather than what you “should” be; Mine!
2Corinthians 4:15-18
“Therefore we do not become discouraged (utterly spiritless, exhausted, and wearied out through fear). Though our outer man is [progressively] decaying and wasting away, yet our inner self is being [progressively] renewed day after day. For our light, momentary affliction (this slight distress of the passing hour) is ever more and more abundantly preparing and producing and achieving for us an everlasting weight of glory [beyond all measure, excessively surpassing all comparisons and all calculations, a vast and transcendent glory and blessedness never to cease!], Since we consider and look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen; for the things that are visible are temporal (brief and fleeting), but the things that are invisible are deathless and everlasting.”
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
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1 comment:
Melanie, I just wanted to say for the record that I still marvel at how brave you were to jump into a new experience like you did without fear.
Sure, it didn't work out, but you gave it your best shot and learned so much in the process.
I was very proud to be your friend every step of the way and still am. I'm always so excited to find out about your new discoveries and adventures.
You may think I'm nuts, but what you see as failure, I see as victory because you go after things fearlessly. How else do we find out what works and what doesn't unless we take the risk and try?
Me... on the other hand, now, there's something to shake your head in puzzlement about... ;-)
♥ ♥ ♥
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